Becoming Conventional

Okay, the ‘Impending’ paper is no longer impending. In fact, its status was stripped 3 bloody days ago- I’m just too jaded to do anything else other than chill and catch up on the neglected housework.

Goodness, how terribly unsexy. I sound like some idiotic wuss who writes about wanting to get married, learning how to be a good wife, cooing over babies… yucks.

On the other news, Gav said I really should take away the self-annointed title of Domestic Goddess. Apparently that’s for “wholesome, clean women with short,sensible permed hair and believe that pleasing a man in bed means bringing a beer and a bowl of chips to the bedside table”. (His words, almost exact.) So, Domestic Slut? I was vacuuming the bloody filthy house with an apron on (a free one cos that was from my previous cafe job, i always wear apron when i do housework, can get very messy you know) and i actually toyed with  the idea of wearing nothing but the apron.

HA HA HA!

Ok but i didn’t cos Annie (Miss CB- Crazy Butch or Chee Bye, you choose) might just pop back into the house to grab some stuff and I cannot imagine the embarassment I would have to endure. Also, the idea of exposing my clean skin while emptying the vacuum bag isn’t very attractive. Despite Gav’s egging, Miss T stayed pure and chaste (insert snide giggles here) and continued to plod around the house with the noisy vacuum cleaner wearing a coral blue long sleeved fleece sweater from U2 and frumpy, sg-preppy, FBT shorts.

Plus, Miss T has put on weight.UGH. I blame it on the lack of shagging, housework and shopping trips. Oh, and the insatiable cravings for chocolate and savoury hot meals to counter the chilly weather. Miss TumTum is back with a vengeance, I am worried that a set of 40 sit-ups daily might not scare her enough to retreat. JigglyThighs™ like to tag along with Miss TT as well and worst of all, DC (DoubleChin) and Co. has carried out a full-fledge corporate expansion on my visage, acquiring two failing companies: Neck Pte Ltd and Jawline Inc.

The no-shag status is overrated by ‘well-meaning’ friends. Seriously. No guys currently and something tells me this is a giant mistake, not a solution on its own. Okay, so the G and Gav thing is spiralling out of hand, I feel awful, really I do. So efforts have been made to not see and talk to both of them, though the latter is almost impossible.

In fact, the more i try to distance myself, the more Gav tries to gambol towards me. Weekly exchanges become daily, the colder my replies, the further he tried to get me out.  There’s something particularly endearing about this that i cannot put my finger on, not that I should try to since common sense should prevail, right?

Ok I don’t need an answer, Never Mind.  

Lesser updates next week- Parentals are coming over and its time for me to erase all traces of men in my life here and present the sight of a clean, chaste, value-driven Asian female.

Woo Hoo.

Them! Yes, THEM!

OH MY GOD ELIZABETH!!!!

I actually found a couple of blogs from my… previous high school.

Aargh!

I never like any part of my high school life, other than the fact that I did relatively well for my leaving exam and could smirk at those horrendous teachers and stupid nerds. I know I’m being horribly unorginal by saying this: but internet really makes the world so much smaller.

Like, this person, whom I remember was obsessed over her first boyfriend. MrPuppyLove’s name consists of the chinese characters of orange, green and red.  In COMMEMORATION of their undying love, she got her friend to go to the bubble tea shop opposite our school to snuck straws of these three colours.

And what’s new? she still can’t spell properly. Blue dude, not B-L-O-O. and not HARLOW, but HELLO. H-E-L-L-O.

Weird.

Never mind.

What about her ‘best friend’, who, incidentally, called herself my best friend as well, only to end up bitching to the whole world about me? thanks woman.

I remembered hanging out with her all the time, cos, well, she’s a good listener and we all have teenage angst we need to vent hey? Noooo, it seemed she did me an extra favour by broadcasting it with extra tidbits added to them as well.

So you decided to be an accountant? Good on you, I always knew you have the calculative streak .

Or this person who used to sit in front of me with her ‘best friend‘. Person’s best friend used to bitch behind her back that she has body odour, is selfish, nosensical trivial things like borrowing her pens constantly… yada yada yada but amazingly, are still mates till this point of time.

Miracles of friendship, man.

Or Nuha? oh man, i remembered her for her petite lanky figure with thick black eyebrows and long black, immaculately braided hair. She’s the class jester- I love how she almost drove Ms Johara crazy.

and her! and her sidekick, her! I remember the latter who had this ‘boyfriend’ from the neighbouring school. (we’re a single sex school, you see, and most of the straight people in my school get their boyfriends in co-ed school around our area)

Amazing. It’s like highschool reunion, with a security barrier that allows you to gawk openly at them.

Gav and Co.

I woke up to a slight throbbing pain on my right arm. A little sore, I turned over and began to blindly palm the bed to search for my pillow.

The bed feels harder than usual and I realised that my quilt cover is a dark shade of blue. What the hell happened to my pink quilt?

 ”You’re finally up?”

 

 Shit.

No wonder I can’t find my teddy or my baby pillow. I’m not in my own bed.

“How long did I sleep for?”

“Well. long enough. We got home at 2 pm and it’s 4.45 pm now.”

“Shit.”

“Well. That’s alright. I took it as a compliment, that I tire you out.”

 I gave a slow lazy smile and stretched languidly. It was a good rest, uncontaminated by the mirage of recurring unpleasant dreams I’ve been having every night.

“Sorry, I only slept 2 hours last night,” I muttered, before scanning the room to look for my clothes.

 ”No worries, I said my entire day is for you anyway.”

Gav can be awfully sweet. I like his spontaneity, the way he would drop all things when I say I’m unhappy. Yet this is precisely the reason why I avoid contact with him when I’m not in the best of moods- who am I to make him do that?

Today, he called me up to see what I’m doing. I sounded especially exuberant- another High Distinction for my essay. He told me he’s gonna come round  to Uni and get me. I knew what he wanted, I needed as well.

“Are you going to send me home now?”

“No,  I thought we were going to have dinner.”

Thank God for late night shopping today. We scoffed down three meat pies- chicken and vegetables (which we shared), minced beef (mine) and steak and kidney (yucks, his), washed down by amazing glass of latte. I like myself better when I am with him- I feel at ease with myself, with the world.

The empty plates and coffee-stained latte glasses lay static on the table while we watched the residents of his suburb rushing to the supermarket to get another week’s of grocery, getting out of the department store, all satisfied from purchases in preparation for the colder season.

I later became one of them as well- I wanted a pair of wool-blend black tights.

He laughed when I said I needed that.

“Highly unsexy, unless I’m into the librarian fantasy thing.”

“Well, try wearing suspenders and sheer stockings  when it’s a bloody 13 degrees celcius,” I laughed.

He pursed his lips, raised his eyebrows and nodded sagely.

“Naw… I don’t think I’m into cross-dressing. Will that turn you on if I wear that?” he asked, before skilfully pinching the pair of tights away, briskly walking to the cashier before I can protest about paying for my own purchase.

“Here, your wool tights. Not even lycra! Kinda feels like husband and wife eh? I’m buying sensible and boring stuff like tights and what’s next? Do you want me to get some toilet rolls and tampons as well?“

There you go, Gav for you.  Adorable brown-eyed, brown-haired Gav. The silly dodo said this to me before I left his car.
“Hey I know you’ve got your birthday thing this week and I’m not invited. That’s fine, I like having you all to myself as well. I’ll make it up to you when your auntie returns, ok?”

 No Gav, I’ll make it up to you.

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The Current One

is Brent.

No, not the mousy Brent who’s from Melbourne taking political science in my uni, but the other Brent whom i met during a Rave last year.

He’s 27 (too young), a cafe staff (no aspirations!), living with his parents (STILL?!) and unbearably nice.

It’s easy. But i’m still deciding. There’s no thrill involved in thi. He’s into me alot more than I’m into him. I like that he’s nice and sweet and doesn’t mindfuck. But the contradicting persona in me doesn’t like him much because he’s too nice, too sweet and doesn’t mindfuck.

B said something right. I might change him to be less of a (good) person he is now (though wouldn’t dare to admit that I have THAT much of an influence on a person). But it all boils down to one thing- I’m only considering him because there’s noone else in my life right now to consider. Not unless G has a divorce, decided to leave his (perfect) life and turn around for me.

Very wishful thinking on my part.